Insecure, thats why it happens

 '' Invasion!! How does it feel? Loving it?? '' 

Sorry. I know I didn't respect your privacy. I was a little too insecure. 
Every time when a message notification pops-up, you would ignore it. You made me feel like as if you were hiding something from me. 
Its ok to chat with girls, to flirt with them. I have no rights to say anything, because you know.
Sigh..

What I am not happy about is not about who you chatting with or how many girls you flirting with or any other things. 
Its because after so long, you still didn't manage to let go. I feel so disappointing. Not to you, but ME. 
I tried all I can,but I still can not win your heart. To be honest, I don't cook, I don't clean, I don't like people talking to me in an inpatient way. I hate to wash! Because my skin will always crack every time I was finish. Sigh.. I am not complaining you know? I just want you to know. 

Now you imagine this,Lets not talk about female or male then. Imagine you've been hurt more then 10 times in your life. You've been thru uncountable shit relationships. But you still give all you can. And now you meet this someone. Who doesn't really like you. Maybe he or she has '' feelings''  for you. You didn't bother but kept caring and giving out. This person does everything with you like a couple, but never says 'love' or call names.How does that suppose to feel? I can not take this as a game and enjoy it. I switched too many times. Is either I stick to go for you, or just end this. Sigh..

I may not waited for you like how you've waited for her and I am not rushing into any relationship with you. I just..  I know. I have no rights to say all this. I am just mad at myself. I really feel so useless. I could just smack my ass and ciao then go date with some guy who gives me everything but I choose not to, because of you. I can tolerate your inpatients -ness, can tolerate you not caring what I like or don't, I can tolerate with how fucked up the sentence you can come out from your mouth to say it to me, I can tolerate you thinking that I am stupid. I can tolerate anything. You can see and feel for yourself how I really give out. I am tired. But I still love you... 

xoxo
Chubbychic